The Story of Bailey Quinn

Bailey's birth story really begins on Thursday, March 24Th. We had fun filled day with Brooke and Adrienne, assuming that it would be our last day as a family of 4. We went to Chuck E. Cheese, Cracker Barrel, and the mall and just soaked up the day to the best of our ability. When we got home, however, we got a call from the hospital informing us that my scheduled C-Section would be post posted due to there being so many women in labor. First it was pushed back to 5 P.M the next day (when it was supposed to be at noon) and then it was pushed back until Sunday.. a whole two days later. I was NOT a happy mama!

Sunday morning FINALLY came, despite the fact that I never thought it would arrive! We had dropped the girls off at my parents' house on Saturday night because we had to be at the hospital at 5:30 that morning. When we got to the hospital, they told me that my pulse was super high and asked if I was nervous... Which I was! However, once I hit it off with a really great nurse and settled in I was more at ease than I could remember feeling in a long time. John was amazingly calm, as well, and that was medicine for my soul!

Two hours after arriving at the hospital the nurse told me it was time. 9 months of waiting were about to come to an end! I walked into the freezing cold operating room, leaving John outside until I was completely prepped. The time where I have to part with him is usually when I lose it but I felt surprisingly okay with everything that was about to take place. They administered my spinal, which I hated but it quickly passed. As soon as they laid me down, my blood pressure dropped and I began to throw up and I literally did not stop for the entire surgery. It was awful!

They brought John into room after about 10 minutes and made the incision around 7:40. This being my third C-Section and all, I was expecting to hear a baby's cry within minutes. The other girls were out in minutes but Bailey wasn't delivered until 8:15, and whole 35 minutes later. I began to feel a familiar tugging and pressure and at last, my sweet girl had made her arrival! I'll never forget... "Welcome to the Hotel California" was on the radio at that exact moment. Kind of funny! Anyways, the nurse and doctors were all upbeat and they quickly brought her to me to show me the fruits of my labor. Adrienne was very sick at birth due to some breathing problems related to her having excess fluid in her lungs so I was really anxious that Bailey would follow in that same path. I just knew she was okay, though, because they let me look at her and enjoy her in the OR before sending her out to the nursery with her daddy.

After John left they finished sewing me up and all of that fun stuff. When my doctor pulled the gown down that was blocking my view of all that was going on, I noticed that his shirt was covered in blood, along with his mask. I was freaked out! He went on to tell me that they had encountered some scar tissue and cut into a blood vessel so I had lost about 1000 CC's of blood. My blood pressure was also very low at that point. He said that would monitor me closely and hopefully avoid a blood transfusion down the road. Apparently that is what had taken so long for them to get Bailey. They had to stop the bleeding before they could move on to deliver her. Interesting..

I went back to my room to recover and quickly asked for my phone so I could call my mom. I was so happy at that moment and I couldn't wait to brag about what I had just conquered. Halfway through that conversation, however, John came in the room with an upset look on his face. I remember saying, "NOT AGAIN!" Then he put his arm on me and said, "Yeah, honey, again." My mom was on the other end of the phone so when I hung up with her, she was greatly worried.

Before I knew it, Bailey had a tube in her throat, oxygen on her to help her breathe, and an IV in her arm:-( I had never even held her or really met her and the pediatrician told me that they would have to send her to another hops ital to adequately care for her. I can remember crying so hysterically that my contacts fell out of my eyes with all of the tears. I can't remember ever being so sad. I knew I would not get to be with her at all which was so, so awful as a mother. Adrienne wasn't as sick so they kept her in the hospital with me. It wasn't ideal but at least I could go down the hall in a wheelchair and see her. This was WAY different.

A team of strangers arrived shortly after that and brought my little girl down to my room in an incubator that was all packed to be loaded on the ambulance. They let me hold her for about 60 seconds and then they took her:-( I was in such a fog when they took her but I remember looking at the nurse and saying, "Don't give her formula." And then looking at another man, "You better drive safely." It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Awful, awful.

I was in a tough spot.... Brooke and Adrienne was dressed in the "Big Sister" shirts ready to meet this baby they had heard so much about. My mom broke the news to them gently and when they came to visit me I had to put on a brave face. It was not easy. Shortly after, John and his parents went up to the other hospital with the girls for the day. My mother stayed by my side the entire day and wouldn't leave me... Which I'm so extremely thankful for. I would have otherwise lost it.

The next 2 days were spent with John shuffling back and forth between Bailey and me. I was deeply depressed and while I was motivated to get out of there for the baby, it was also hard to find the strength to get out of bed. The sounds of babies crying down the hall were a constant reminder of what I was missing. I'll never forget that horrible feeling the first time I realized that ALL the baby stuff had been removed from our room.. No cradle or blankets, diapers, or wipes. It was like she was dead. I know that sounds awful but that's how I felt.

It was also very hard because I pumped every two hours for days to encourage my milk to come in. I would pump for twenty minutes on each side and just cry when I looked down and saw no milk in the bottles. That meant that there was no food to send to my baby:-( She ended up having to eat a little of formula which KILLED me but I can't dwell on that.

I was finally released on Tuesday afternoon and I was quickly reunited with my sweet daughter. I can't even express how amazing and emotional that was. She was released from the hospital shortly after we went to pick her up and our new life had began!

There are so many things I could say about this experience... How robbed I felt of my daughter's first days, how depressed I felt, how lonely I was at times or how extremely empty my heart was. I could also mention that not one of my three births have been magical or what I wanted them to be. Those things are all true but the bigger picture is that I watched my husband draw near to the Lord in the midst of it and bring me along with him. He and I had such sweet moments together and I fell even more in love with him. It was incredible. I also was overwhelmed by the love and support from my family.

I feel so blessed because Bailey has been my best nurser, which is something that worried me while she was being formula fed in the NICU. I also have experienced little to no "Baby Blues," which is something I usually really struggle with. God has really taken care of me in these areas and through it all.

No matter how difficult it was getting her here, Bailey is here now and doing great. I suppose that that's really all that matters when it's all said and done!