Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Overcome with Sorrow

Today I was made aware of a family that lost their precious son only 16 minutes after he was born. I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face because I just read the lady's blog and there are no words to describe the anguish I feel for her. I want so desperately for this all to be a dream for her, but it's reality and it's something that this family actually has to face. I can't comprehend what they must be going through at this moment.

I know that I am blessed to have Brooke, who is healthy, strong, and thriving, but I guess that when I thought of this family today that I felt an extra measure of gratitude towards God for allowing her to live in our home. The silly things she does and the little facial expressions she makes are constant reminders to me of how precious and beautiful life is. Life is also a fragile thing, as we saw today with this tiny baby, and that scares me so bad. Our very lives are only sustained by the grace of God and He can chose to take it from us in a heartbeat.

I am weeping for this family because I can't imagine missing out on all of the wonderful things that parenting Brooke has brought forth in my life... Staring at her while she sleeps, tucking her into bed, singing to her, praying for her, holding her, kissing her, hugging her, laughing hysterically with her, and just being able to experience the world through her inquisitive little eyes. Brooke is my world and I can't imagine how different my life would be without her to love.

It's crazy to think that God is still sovereign, even in the midst of death and heartache. Only He knows the bigger picture and only He has the capacity to make an impossible situation, such as this, work out for His honor and glory. I am really questioning God's purpose in all of this but I still recognize that it's in His hands and that this precious baby is resting safely with his creator, free of pain or fear.

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