Things That Go Ouch In the Night

Yes, the thing going "Ouch" in the night last night was ME. Brooke woke up around 2:30 to nurse and because I was so tired from the awful night before, I just brought her in with me in hopes of us both resting well. She latched on and we both fell peacefully asleep. About 5 or 10 minutes later, I woke up to EXCRUCIATING pain, which was Brooke biting on my nipple with her 9 teeth. I flicked her cheek and she just bit down harder, I yelled at her and again, she continued to bite. Finally after smacking her hand, she let go. I discovered that I was bleeding and have teeth indentation in my breast. That wasn't even the worst part... I was awake for the next hour because I was in that much pain. It hurt so bad that I thought I needed to throw up. I can't even describe how terrible it hurt last night. It's still throbbing to this very moment. I can't even nurse her on that side because it's in so much pain.

I went to nurse Brooke again this morning on the other side and she did the same thing, except I caught her early enough so she couldn't draw blood this time. I seriously don't know how to get through to her. I'm so frustrated!

John suggested that maybe this was the end of our nursing relationship... That maybe she's just fooling around and frustrated by nursing, so she bites. Of course when he said that I cried hysterically. I had always envisioned myself weaning Brooke gently, lovingly, and in HER timing. While I don't want to nurse her forever, the thought of even thinking of weaning her really hit a sore spot. Nursing her has almost consumed my life over the last year. Ya know? It's something that she and I have shared and enjoyed together. To me, there's nothing more amazing than when she's nursing and she looks up at me and coos or giggles. That melts my heart like nothing else on this planet. I also don't have a huge urge to wean now because she's not so dependent on me to nurse that I can't leave her if necessary. It's only a couple of feedings a day that we're still holding on to and I don't think it's a big deal.

For now, I'm going to continue with the "don't ask, don't refuse" philosophy. This means that she can nurse if she wants to, but I'm not going to routinely offer her the opportunities to nurse. Her drinking whole milk has tamed down our nursing relationship a lot. Before the milk she seriously was nursing CONSTANTLY and now that it's minimal I can see why extended nursing is so doable.

As I said before, nursing is so emotional, special, and wonderful. I think that I'm more attached to it than Brooke is! Lol! What it all boils down to, however, is that I want to do the best thing possible for her. If continuing to nurse is what's best, then by all means, I'll keep going! But, on the sad side, if she's ready to wean and that's what's best for her, we'll work on that. I don't care what people say or think or if anyone thinks that extended nursing is wrong or abnormal. I repeat.. I WILL DO WHAT'S BEST FOR MY DAUGHTER.

Off to do some housework while my precious little biter sleeps soundly. Nap times are so relaxing around here!

Real quick before I go, here's a cute picture I wanted to share with you all. This was taken at Target a few days ago. We were trying Easter hats on her. The look on her face is priceless!